Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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