It's Friday. Sex?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
