that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
