and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
