how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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