I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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