I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
