I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
