I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
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