we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
