I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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