Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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