Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
