Where is the hickey?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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