no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Randomize