We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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