why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
