Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Everyone says I win the strip club
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
