By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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