we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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