I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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