Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
