this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
