i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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