if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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