Walk of Shame. In a state park.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
