Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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