the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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