gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Farmville is her only friend.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
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