my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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