u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i permit you to call me
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Drunk is not a location!
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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