I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
