my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Green mimosas i think yes
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
