somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
