Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
