i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
