You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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