I must be too annoying 4 u.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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