my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
That reminds me...we need to get swords
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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