i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
