..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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