Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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