I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
