people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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