I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
