Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
