Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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