Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
