My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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