have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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